Less Than Six Hours

*On the last day of class everyone is scrambling to turn things in to all their teachers.  Three students in a row all ask me to go see other teachers*

Me: "Apparently everyone has some place they need to be, but none of those places are here."

*Student takes out headphones*

Student: "Hey Mr., could I go to the library to print something?

/facepalm

Dress Down

How Do I Internet?

Student: "Can you print off a job application for me?"

Me: "Sure, just send me a message in schoolloop (our grading software) with a link."

Student: "A what?"

Me: "A link to the webpage.  The website address."

Student: "How do I do that?"

Me: "Find the application, copy the link, and send it do me."

Student: "..."

Me: "Do you know how to post an article to Facebook?"

Student: "You mean share something?"

Me: "No, I mean posting something new."

Student: "Not really.  When I was looking at the application earlier it had a lot of options to pick from; how is that going to work on paper?"

Me: "You mean it was an online application?"

Student: "Yeah"

Me: "I can't print that off since it is a website."

Student: "Why can't you print a website?"

/headdesk

I'm not sure what's worse.  One of my students asking someone else for the answer to two minus seven, or the second student honestly giving a wrong answer.

Loan Shark

Check Your Work

Student: "What am I doing wrong here?  This doesn't make sense."

Me: "Well 3 times -1 isn't 4."

Student: "Ohhhhh...."

The Problem With Knowing Math and Being a Smart-Ass

*Yup, thats a /facepalm*