Hello Weekend

*yelling from the hallway at the end of Friday*

Student: "MAN, THIS IS WHY I HATE THIS FUCKIN' SCHOOL!!!"

Teacher 1: "No, you don't."

Teacher 2: "Happy Friday...."

The Sound of Pain

We have automatic bells that ring to change classes, and being an old building these are actual bells instead of digital.  There are a few places in the school where the bells have worn out and all you hear is metal grinding on metal.

Dream On

Student: "When are we ever going to use this?"

Me: "Probably about the time you want to pass this class and graduate."

Student: "No, I mean in real life?"

Me: "Do you mean that this isn't real life?  Have I been dreaming this entire time?!?  SOMEONE WAKE ME UP!"

Supplies

Student 1: "I got two burritos in my bag."

Student 2: "..."

Student 1: "I'm not even joking."  *pulls two burritos out of his bag.*

Smarties?

One of my students is trying to eat a package of smarties without taking them out of the wrapper.

Fightin' Words

Me: "There are four problems on today's quiz.  Three of them are the special cases that we saw on Tuesday.  One of them is just a traditional problem, but I'm not going to tell you which one it is."

Student: "Oh, we about to fight today."

A Little Help From My Friends

This was posted inside the door to the boys bathroom.

Classroom Tag

Tit for Tat

Student: "Isn't it fun when I contradict you?"

Me: "No, it isn't"

Student: "Well, it's a ton of fun for me.  It should be fun for you too."

Me: "Actually I was just contradicting you there."

Student: "...."

So Bland

Students playing Catchphrase

Student 1: "White people eat a lot of it."

Student 2: "Kale!"