Wild Wild West.

I thought I saw a bug moving across my floor. It turned out to be a tumbleweave. 

Euphemism

Student returns to class after an unusually long time in the bathroom

Student: *points to her weave* "I had to get some grease in my hedge."

Girlfights

The severity of any fight can be judged by the amount of weave left on the ground.  This week was particularly bad.

Redemption

At the end of yesterday I was completely stressed out about students acting like jerks, but my last class of the day completely redeemed themselves.

One of my students in the class is out and obviously flamboyant in the way he acts.  He is also  about 6'4", so he tends to stand out.  Yesterday he arrived late and dressed completely as a woman.  No one batted an eye.  Most students didn't even look liked they noticed, but once we stared with our time for the daily assignment a few of the girls went over to compliment him on his first weave.

Sometimes teenagers can surprise you for the best.

Truth

Student: "Girl, you know you trashy if you takin' out yo' weave in class."

Bad Weave

Student 1: "I'm so excited, the weather next week is supposed to be nice.  Imma put in my bad weave."

Me: "Your bad weave?"

Student 1: "My bad B weave."

Student 2: "Your bad bitch weave?"

Me: "I clearly didn't understand what she was saying, thank you for explaining."

First day of school

This (school) year I have decided to start a blog full of the random and usually hilarious things that my students say in class.  For the most part I want to keep it focused simply on what the students are saying rather than me complaining or bringing politics into this.

From time to time I may put up an old quote when nothing of note has happened.  Here is a good one from a few years back.

Student: "Man, My weave itch"
Me: "I get that problem all the time."
Student: "Mr. you have a weave? Man that's crispy."